Work vs. Home

Let's get into my mood today,  yes?

At work, I feel confident. I'm happy, people everywhere love me. They say I'm pretty, and I believe them because I mentally told myself before I went to work. I'm the best salesperson, the best cashier, the favorite of everyone.

At home...I'm a weak, co-dependent child. Or, at least I feel that way. I don't feel pretty (I feel healthy, which is different), and stress can get to me in an instant. Panic attacks hit me at odd places (like school, awesome!) and I have no friends. 

My question is, what's so different about work and home? Why can't I be happy all the time? I know that I'm sick of crying and feeling horrible, but I honestly cannot help it. I sink into something that, as much as I try, I cannot get out of until I go to work. 

I believe it's some type of depression, or, as my doctor says, simply the fact that I "feel more than other people" because my biological mother is bipolar. Whatever it is, I'm going to both my doctor and my therapist to figure out what is wrong and what I can do about it.

(Edit: as I was writing this, a follower on my blog called me very pretty, and that honestly made my entire week. I love people so much.)

Thank you.

Danielle